June 6, 2020

On Diary Writing

Diary writing gives your life a definite shape. It’s a place where you can be yourself. It’s a place to introspect. All in all it’s your “no-guilt” space. It’s fun re-reading your diaries every once in a while. You get a clear picture of your journey – fondly called as ‘life’.

Here’s an excerpt of my heart :

Diaries have always been close to my heart. Being the introvert that I was in my school days, and a part of me still is, diaries have been an integral part of my life. The first time I decided to write in a diary was in my 10th stds. Unlike other girls, I was travelling to a state out of Maharashtra for the first time on our school picnic. I wished to record everything I experienced in that 8-day picnic. And I did. I wrote in this little diary on the train, in the 4star hotel room and whenever I got a chance to pause and write.

 

And then there was no stopping. Every year I would ask my father if anyone had given him a diary in the office and I would start with no goal or pattern as such. I did not mind if I wrote on February 16 when the diary page said January 1st. Sometimes I did not bother about the year even. I scribbled carelessly. I longed to share my deepest thoughts with someone sane. With someone who would listen and not give me unsolicited advice. 

 

Slowly, as life happened, and I had a lot to share, I started paying attention to the dates. Ignoring the dates on the dairies, I wrote the real dates by myself. By then I had my blog to share my thoughts with my readers but somehow everything couldn’t be put up on the blog and so I started writing rigorously in my diaries and I never knew I’ll end up having so many of them. Yesterday, when I sat to read these, I was taken aback by the fact that how much a human mind could think and blabber out on the pages of a dairy. I was mesmerised to read some beautiful memories from the past and was thankful to myself that I’ve treasured all of them in these little diaries. 

 

I wrote everything that came to my mind, goals- some of which are achieved and others are being worked upon. To-do-lists- they’re all over the diaries, compliments from readers, musings, poems, the people around me, the people who were just visitors to my life, the research I do for my blogs, some incomplete stories, reviews of the books that I loved the most, notes from writing courses I attended, and so much more. 

 

It is funny how some people take the maximum space in our diaries and are no longer a part of our lives. 

Today when I read these dairies, I smile at how my amateur writing is improving year after year or maybe I should say dairy after diary. 

 

When I started writing diaries, little did I know that I’ll end up having one for every year. Some are loosened and some have their pages coming out but I don’t feel like letting them go. I hide them in my cupboard and will keep stacking them in the years to come. 

 

My handwriting still depends on my mood, just like it did in my school days. You shouldn’t see it. 

 

I don’t write every day in the diaries. I pour out my thoughts and feelings on some crucial days. But yes, I’ve maintained a quarantine diary and have made a point to write every single day. After 5 or 10 years when I’ll read this one, I don’t know how I’d feel, but yes, it would definitely be a different experience altogether similar to what I have every year while reading the old ones. 

Anne Frank had her Kitty...and I have them
Anne Frank had her Kitty…and I have them