In today’s society, it is necessary to have an honest answer to the question – How to be happy in a relationship. Because once you are in a relationship, you feel that’s enough to make you happy.
You feel that’s a happy ending. Your first few months are magical, with everything around you is bliss. You’re comfortable with your significant other.
You feel everything is best about your loved one. You celebrate those significant days. Then there are gifts, surprises, candlelight dinners, etc.
To cut short the long story, “Love is in the air,” in the initial days of any relationship.
Then as the relationship grows old and as the shine wears off, you start taking your girl/boy for granted. This blog is a warning bell for those who’re doing the same.
Many a time, the number of years you’re in a relationship before tieing knot matters too. So, this blog is divided into 3 parts.
1. If your relationship is 1 month old.
This is the most special period of your relationship. You’d never ask how to be happy in a relationship in the very first month.
You’d be glued to your phone almost 24*7 (to only put it off while you fall asleep either tired or in the mid of the chat). You’d probably start your day with a video call and end it with the same ritual(if you’re into a long distance relationship).
Life would be at its best. You’d get butterflies in stomach whenever he/she texted or said: “I Love you.”
There’d be love in every act you’d do. There’d be many gifts and surprises you’d keep giving each other. Watching movies together in theatres goes without saying.
All in all, you’d be satisfied and on cloud nine. So, there’s no need to worry.
2.If your relationship is 1 year old.
Now that all the days are celebrated, you’ve left with nothing to do, you start taking each other for granted. You stop saying: I love you very often.
You start getting bored of talking. That’s natural. But do follow the below things actually to remain happy even after 1 year.
1.Spend quality time together
Though this sounds like a no-brainer, you often forget it. It becomes utmost essential to take some time off for him/her every day. It’s okay if it is only 15 minutes.
Share the whereabouts of your day. Listen to each other talk.
If you have nothing to talk about, just be together. Cuddle each other. Pamper each other for no reason at all.
2.Ditch the expectations
If you wait for the other person to call first, you’d probably keep waiting forever. If you miss him/her why not just pick up the phone and call?
Why expect a call from the other side? Half of the relationships today, break off because of the never-ending expectations.
If you get your ego into a relationship, it’s meant to be broken.
Expect less and love more. Make sure you do what you feel like and when you feel like. Don’t wait for the right time.
Don’t wait for your significant other to hug you first you are feeling like doing so. Just go ahead and hug him/her.
You aren’t a magician or a mind-reader that you’ll know what’s going on in his/her mind. There are chances even he/she would want a hug and is waiting for you to hug first.
If both think: “Why me first?”, ultimately the hug won’t happen at all.
3. Take efforts.
Gradually, as months pass by, the efforts also start dying off.
You need to take efforts to keep your relationship alive explicitly. A plant grows healthier when you water it daily. Likewise, pour your efforts into a relationship to keep it blossoming.
If you run out of gifts, a simple hand-made greeting card is enough to put a smile on his/her face. If you run out of money, an eclair is more than enough to keep him/her content.
This may sound cliche, but it is of utmost importance today where we’re all running the rat-race.
Little things matter.
3.If your relationship is 10 years old.
Hitting a decade in a relationship before marriage happens in the rarest of the cases. But mind you its the unique yet difficult thing for any couple.
If you’re in your 10th year, it’s understood that you’d know each other in and out. There’s no secret between the two of you.
Despite all the understanding, sometimes things don’t fall into place.
1. Trust your significant other
At this point in time, you need to trust your loved one with all your heart. Especially you happen to be in a long distance relationship trust factor plays a vital role.
If there’s trust, there’ll be no room for misunderstanding too.
Sometimes, its more important to say: “I trust you” than “I love you.”
Now that you’re together for 10 years, you know love is the reason. But to conquer many such decades together, you need to keep the trust factor intact.
2. Do not pester each other
Giving each other the required space goes without saying. If you keep pestering your loved one, you’ll be hampering his/her freedom.
Live and let live.
Follow this simple principle, and you shall attain peace in a relationship.
3. Stop being over possessive
There’s a thin line between jealousy and possessiveness. Every girl feels good at the back of her mind if her guy is jealous when he sees her with some other guy.
The jealously healthy until it crosses the thin line and transforms into possessiveness.
If you trust him/her by all your heart, there’s no question of being possessive. Possessiveness kills the love he/she has for you and fear starts crawling in.
If your significant other is scared of you, you’ve almost lost him/her. Because love doesn’t dwell where there is fear.
Stop showing over possessiveness when you’re in a relationship. Give freedom and get loved. Do not suffocate your loved one by showing your possessiveness.
4.Respect each other’s choices
You know your significant other likes and dislikes. Don’t force him/her to stop liking or to dislike the same.
You need to respect each other’s choices. After 10 years, do you think they’ll change?
Don’t expect someone to change as you like them to be. You’re with the person for 10 years, because you loved them. Why will you want the person to change?
By doing this aren’t you challenging your own choice that you made 10 years ago?
5. Be happy when together
5 years ago, when I was in college, I saw a couple sitting on the railway station on a bench. Both were busy playing games on their respective phones.
I thought, “They could do this at their respective homes also. Why sit there together and not talk to each other?”
This was 5 years ago, you know the situation worsens with time. Today, couples sit together and tag each other on social media.
Be happy together, not on social media. Upload less of joy on Instagram stories and get more intimate in real life.
“Private life is a happy life.”
6. Don’t badmouth your partner
All relationships have problems that sometimes get difficult to discuss with each other. It happens. Don’t freak out.
Talk to your close friends. But while doing so be careful, you don’t badmouth your partner in front of any third person. Not even your close friend.
Respect your partner’s qualities, both positive as well as negative.
If you liked reading this blog, please share with your friends who are in a relationship. And don’t worry, when you fall into one, it’ll help you too.
P.S. When I write a blog, I make sure I implement it first.